Black Women in Sovereignty: An Owner's Manual

Definition of Sovereignty (Internal Authority)

The technical definition is: "The supreme power to govern our own people and enforce laws without external interference." I titled this article precisely because so many successful Black women have reached this place of governing their lives on their own terms, and I call this power intuition.

I truly believe that for anyone to deeply know themselves, truly change their lives, or manifest anything new in their 3D reality, they must possess an unwavering trust in themselves. As Vanessa Kingori so beautifully stated: You have to be the CEO of your own life.

This event was filled with powerful Black women entrepreneurs, and it was a clear indication that they’re all showing up for better, for greatness, for change. They aren't waiting on anyone to bring forth that shift; it is a self-governing decision on their part—and on mine, too. I can speak for many women when I say we all want a provider, a man to ease our stress, but over the years, I’ve realized we have to create our own provisions. That way? We make our own rules.

Unlocking the Power of Purpose

Even though this article is primarily focused on us women, I want to include two discussions that perfectly tie into this topic. The first was “Unlocking the Power of Purpose in Business” with Emmanuel Eribo, CEO of Loci.

Emmanuel Eribo’s Quotes:

• “If you live by the cheers, you’ll die by the boo’s.”

• “Stay grounded and focused; your game is your game.”

• “Pick up transferable skills; become versatile.”

• “The value is in YOU.”

The two points that truly stuck with me, and which I’m sure many of us women can relate to, are the first and the last. The first quote ultimately speaks to the need for external validation. In this fast age of social media, AI, and so much chaos, you can genuinely feel like you’re walking on eggshells because everyone is so sensitive about the wrong things.

But I’m here to tell you: Being misunderstood is a blessing. It allows you to make decisions on your own accord without needing validation or verification from anyone. When your audience—or anyone else, for that matter—disagrees with your actions, you won’t cry about it.

I've built a very open platform for myself in terms of truly showing up authentically. This way, I am not boxing myself in. I can pivot, change careers as much as I want, post random dance videos, talk about sex—whatever it is. I show up as me, and no one gets to tell me otherwise. Never put yourself in a cage when you’ve always got the keys!

The second point is that The Value is in You. Once again, I’m directing this to us women: We are inherently valuable. This means that just simply being born a woman makes you valuable, point blank period. Seeing so many successful Black women at this event really showed me that we are rising to this truth, and I’m very proud to see it. If you don’t know your worth, how can you ever truly know yourself?

Now for what I’m sure you’ve been waiting for: Here are three dynamic women who are making monumental strides in their careers.

Title of discussion: Founders Share the Unfiltered Journey to Success.

This panel featured Patricia Bright, Avril Grant, and Clement. Patricia is a UK lifestyle creator with 1.1 million followers on Instagram. Avril Grant is a business coach, and Clement is the owner of the popular UK pub, ‘Prince of Peckham.’

Patricia Bright: “The game only stops when you stop.”

This was a profoundly important point, and I had to start with it. Being a business owner or entrepreneur is no easy thing. We face so many unforeseen challenges; sometimes, we just have to change directions. I know I’ve changed directions so much that to an outsider, it may look like I don’t have any sort of direction, but that’s the beauty of a self-governing woman: She doesn't care; I don’t care. I make my own rules. My higher self and I are locked in, and I trust my decisions. When you know you are meant for greatness, you won’t let anything stand in your way. Patricia is totally right: things only stop when you give up.

Clement, owner of Prince of Peckham, a popular pub in South London, also had some truly great points. One was “Black excellence should be seen everywhere,” and the second was “Take ego away; it has no place in business.” Clement is a very successful man, and for him to say leave your ego at the door, I think we should all take heed. Our ego wants to keep us safe, but this often holds us back more than we are consciously aware of.

Melissa’s Wardrobe was quite forthcoming about her journey towards launching 'Leluxe' her new perfume-infused laundry brand, which is so on brand! She knew that even though her word on her platform is gold and that anything she promotes will sell, she still took her time perfecting her products. Why? Because she has integrity. She wants her consumers to truly love and value the product just as she does. Whether it took six months, two years, or five years, her ego would not make that decision for her. That's what I gathered from that explanation; what do you think?

Conversation with Vanessa Kingori, Managing Director at Google

Here’s some backstory to Vanessa: She didn’t speak until she was three, and when she finally did, it was in semi-coherent lines of communication, which is very advanced for a toddler. Born in Kenya and raised by her mother and grandmother, she has always had powerful women around her—motivating, loving, and guiding her. This foundation is pivotal in a child’s upbringing. Vanessa is a mother herself, a business leader in tech, fashion, and media, and to round it off, she's a Scorpio!

During her segment, I could really relate to a lot of her philosophies because they pretty much align with mine—not everything, of course, but especially the part about not following the crowd or trends. This once again ties into our title: You have to stand for something, or you’ll fall for anything. Learn yourself, or someone else will tell you who you are.

Vanessa continued by saying, “She is not defined by where she works; separate yourself from what you do.” This is something I am very good at. I want to be many things in this life, and we are multidimensional beings—why limit ourselves? I thoroughly enjoyed Vanessa’s discussion, and I am very inspired by her drive to create new ground for herself while simultaneously honouring the generations who came before her.

Playing the Long Game with Melissa's Wardrobe

“I’m a business man, got a business plan, meet me at my office Leluxe.”

I want to end this article with Melissa’s conversation.

For my Caribbean readers who may not know who Melissa’s Wardrobe is, she is a UK celebrity stylist, beauty expert, and interior decorator. She has styled Stormzy, Anthony Joshua, Zeze Mills, Conna Walker, Maya Jama, Sabrina Elba, and many more British A-list celebrities. The woman knows what she’s doing!

I’ve been following Melissa’s journey for a while now, and what I really love about her is her authenticity. She’s raw, funny, and just so natural in who she is. That’s exactly why she continues to grow and attract the success she has. During her conversation, she mentioned wanting to finally have something that would work for her instead of her working for it, hence the birth of her new business, Leluxe.

Melissa's Quotes:

• “Play the long game.”

• “Don’t be afraid to fail.”

• “Distractions are a big waste of time.”

• “Just do it.”

In conclusion, women, we have to be the CEOs of our lives. No one will save you. Being in victimhood won’t save you. It’s only intentional actions each day towards your future that will create these major shifts. Whatever vision you have, let it be authentic to you. Don’t limit yourself, especially not now when we have so much privilege and freedom as women. These three women have been breaking barriers, and I am deeply inspired by them.

Remember: You and you alone make the rules for your life. Whatever you put your mind to can and will manifest; you just have to believe.

What part of this article resonated with your own personal journey toward sovereignty the most?