What’s dating like in London, compared to the Caribbean?

Before I jump into all the juicy, raw, unfiltered details of this question, I want to highlight the book that inspired this article. I’ve been reading a book called 'Want' by Gillian Anderson, and it’s a collection of anonymous fantasies that women have. We readers get to peek inside this world of intimacy, desire, sexuality, and liberation, all wrapped up in a pink cover.

Our Purpose

Now, I didn’t want this article to be focused solely on the sexual aspect of a heterosexual relationship. My goal is more about giving women and men in our community a safe space to share their dating experiences. This platform is here to educate the collective; no one is above change. The perspectives and quotes in this article aren't here to bash anyone—far from it. We’re here to break down divisions. For the people who genuinely respect and deeply love what we each represent (life), then stick around and keep an open mind. Read, process, and do with the information what you wish.

A Personal Reflection

Courting is definitely a lost art form, especially when it comes to men. Everyone in this world has been hurt in one way or another, and of course, everyone is guarding their hearts. But when do we actually give into love?

I know for me, I’ve always wanted an unshakable bond with a man. However, over the years I’ve grown to realise that looking for the love you seek is a futile pursuit—the love can be found within. Deep, deep within.

My dating life hasn’t been the smoothest, and I believe it’s because I was often focusing on the wrong things in the individual, so much so that I missed vital information. Do not rush this stage of getting to know a soul. They are coming with so many layers: baggage, mindsets, experiences, values, and spirits connected to them. This is deep shit; don't take it lightly.

In this article, I’ll break down some raw data from women & men I’ve asked about their dating experiences. This is a no-judgement zone, only a place to learn, reflect, and share. Come with an open mind and a willingness to grow.

Inspiration :

Women’s Quotes

Anonymous: Age 30

“I can honestly say I’ve never been on a date just situationships, the reason being is because I was sheltered growing up , and social anxiety also had a part to play, and men give me anxiety. Since I was 12/13 men would be trying to talk to me so I felt disgusted even though I am attracted to them.”

Uk: “There is a lot of ambitious men they aren’t lazy, they work”

Grenada: “They want to be in control when they have no leadership skills. They are leeches, when they know a woman has money or she’s doing well for herself, they see money signs in their eyes. They are literal bitches.”

Anonymous: Age 22

“Both of them are shit, there’s no difference.” 

Uk : “British men are more trying to lock in a date quicker. They will take you on a date to strictly get what they want…”

Jamaica: “Jamaican men compliment women more, they’re more freakier, so they’re more prone to come off as extremely sexual.”

Anonymous: Age 61

Grenada: “Grenada is a non-dating culture zone. The average man has no idea what it is to date a woman. 90% of the men have no driver's license, so they have no way to even pick you up for the date. I believe this plays a major part in the no dating culture. Now, on the other hand you do have some great lovers on Island, but because they think that's all they are worth, they want to charge for the dick. So all you have left is a begging man with good dick...and that surely won't last long! Grenadian men have no problem begging a woman for money...big big turn off!” 

Uk : “As far as UK men, they want fake boobs, fake ass, wigs, long eyelashes.....no natural sisters. So, I was counted out from the door. It's either all that fake shit or white women for them!” 

Anonymous: Age 34

“Dating can be challenging no matter where you are, but I’ve personally found it more difficult in Grenada. In my experience, there seems to be less emphasis on commitment, and it’s important to be cautious about people’s intentions, some may not always be transparent about their circumstances and many have partners emphasis on the plural. That’s not to say all men are like this; I’ve met genuine people with good intentions. However, the dating culture overall feels less consistent in that regard.”

“In the UK, dating has its own issues, there’s an abundance of choice, which can make people slower to commit. Still, I’ve found that many approach dating with clearer intentions and a genuine desire to build something meaningful.”

Anonymous: Age 40

“People are lazy nowadays, no one wants to try, building a connection is not easy we all know this, but isn’t a healthy love worth changing for?”

Anonymous: Age 29

UK: “They can be very materialistic and are very often consumed with their careers that they don’t fully invest time or effort to get to nurture a connection” 

Anonymous: Age 27

“I hate when men go after women they cant afford. If you see her with Starbucks every morning, hair slayed for the gods every 2 weeks, a different designer bag everyday, nail color changed weekly, on a trip every other month, never in the same outfit twice.....WHY WOULD YOU PURSUE HER IF YOU CANT SUSTAIN THAT LIFESTYLE? Simply stop going for women who are out of your league physically and financially then making that woman feel like the lifestyle she created for herself is "doing too much" or too high maintenance“

Anonymous: Age 38
“Shaggy must have gotten inspiration for his hit song “It wasn’t me” from Vincentian men. The way they lie or try to lie their way out of situations where they’ve been caught red handed needs to be studied. Like Sir there is a used condom under our bed, you and I don’t use condoms together so did it magically appear out of nowhere? Miss me with that ish!”

Anonymous: Age 52

Grenada: “Both sexes are quite comfortable approaching those they are interested in without hesitation. A date may consist of going to a sporting event with a possible snack and a drink. Some men are quite comfortable having the woman cover the expenses which can be a turn off. Most men can cook, so that for some women maybe a fair trade. Infidelity amongst both sexes is an issue. Most have no problems stepping out or settling and feel that it's okay for their partners to cheat. Some men and women lack the motivation for more than just getting by and  Interlectual conversations can at times be at a deficit.”

UK : There's more of a variety of things to do. The expectation of who pays for the date is oftentimes covered by the man. One can generally find someone who complements their taste. Superficial looks are at times preferred and the differences in culture plays an important role in what's considered acceptable or not.”

Anonymous: Age 47

While many quotes focused on the complexities of courtship, some voices raised a far more serious concern regarding safety. This sentiment reflects the alarming reality highlighted by reports, such as those indicating that approximately 20% of Grenadian women report being sexually abused as children, and that sexual violence remains a pervasive issue.

This raw feeling of vulnerability was powerfully captured by one contributor, who shared their perception of the worst dating dynamic in Grenada:" There are a lot of rapists and child molesters, they only want to get they prick wet. They don’t care about nothing else” 

This perspective highlights the urgent need to address systemic issues of safety and respect—topics that transcend simple dating advice and demand collective community action.

Men’s Quotes

Anonymous: Age 41

“One of the biggest difference, I see in terms of the expression of our relationships in the UK versus the Caribbean or Grenada rather is the fact that public affection is not something that’s common. I rarely see a caribbean man holding hands with his woman and walking.”

Anonymous: Age 35

“All I know is back home, everyone is in your business if they see you with someone from the opposite sex they automatically assume that is your person”

Anonymous: Age 22

UK :“I can’t really compare it to any other place, but one thing I will say is that dating here is more transactional because a lot of women (not all women) are being tricked by consumerism into only dating men that can provide a lavish lifestyle for them at a very young age. There are VERY few unrealistic standards here right now. “

Anonymous: Age 32

“Few Grenadians date. People just hook up and have sex. Most are not in a monogamous relationship either. Horning is a sport.”

Anonymous: Age 32

“From my perspective, dating in Grenada is often more about the excitement and experience than long-term commitment. When relationships face challenges, many people prefer to move on rather than work through the issues.”

Anonymous: Age 27

“I would say Guyanese women seek trill instead of a relationship. However Guyanese women are more caring and feminine.” 

Anonymous: Age 30

“Women don’t spend their money in Guyana”

Anonymous: Age 20

Guyana: “One night stands are not a regular or common culture down here as compared to the UK”

Anonymous: Age 34

“Guyanese women are too stupidly selective”

Anonymous: Age 27

“Caribbean people are not as family oriented as they think they are, because when you look at London/US relationships you see what family orientation really is.”

Conclusion:
I want to start by saying thank you to each and every one of you that said yes to this article; you all showed up for my creativity, and I am very grateful. This couldn't have happened without all your inputs.

The first thing that I have acknowledged with this article is how quickly you all responded to my invitation to share your experiences, perspectives, and quotes. This showed me that many of us are very much still interested in dating and building connections.

I will leave these quotes here for my readers to process, and I will be back with another article that will analyse what I’m seeing in this divide and how we can all heal and grow through this.

I welcome all inputs in the comments; let’s start the conversation.